Category Archives: Marriage & Divorce
'Bomb Drop!' Quadd Webb-Lunceford BREAKS Down Amid Husband Cheating Allegations In Exclusive Sneak Peek
In this exclusive clip, Married to Medicine’s Quad Webb-Lunceford relives the moment she found out her husband, Dr. Gregory Lunceford, was cheating on her, and reading all the blogs that followed. “Gregory knows I’m 10 minutes from f***ing divorcing his a**! He knows that,” she says.
Dr. Jackie Walters also dealt with her husband, Curtis Berry infidelities earlier this year. The two have gone through a LOT but it looks like the women are supporting each other.
Watch the video above to see Quad’s tense phone call with her husband!
Make sure you catch Married to Medicine Sunday, September 30th at 8 p.m. only on Bravo!
When a marriage feels like being caught in quicksand
Dear Carolyn
DEAR CAROLYN: Is a separation cruel? Prolonging the inevitable? In counseling now but I feel claustrophobic, like we can’t have a conversation without the weight of his fear and my frustration overshadowing everything. If I don’t get some space, there’s no way we’ll make it. If I do, we still might not.
I feel I have no choice here — stay in the marriage and make everyone else happy, or leave and make them all miserable. How do you develop your swimming skills when you are sinking in quicksand? Is it wrong to get out and see if you can make your way back?
— Separating
DEAR SEPARATING: No. It is wrong to act with ulterior motives, but it is not wrong to save yourself first if that is the only way you can envision saving your marriage.
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Your calculation is clear — staying will kill the marriage, leaving might kill the marriage — and it says to go. But you can’t take yourself so easily at your own word, not yet. You need to be fiercely honest with yourself about your true goal: Do you want a chance at reconciliation, or do you want out? Both can be valid; this is just not the time to be disingenuous. Or timid.
Also keep in mind: Whether separation ultimately saves your marriage is irrelevant. You don’t justify the choice through the outcome, but instead through the careful consideration of your present conditions — which sound bad for you and “everyone else.”
If by “everyone” you mean children, too, then don’t assume staying makes everyone “happy.” Kids’ needs are abundant and clear and best served by stability, yes. An intact home, however, can also be unstable; make decisions toward a family that functions emotionally, not just one that shares space. Push through the weight to say what you need to say.
DEAR CAROLYN: I have three friends, two with money and one poorer. The poorer one borrowed money from both of my richer friends and has not paid them back. She has gotten some money together, and told me she wants to buy her boyfriend an expensive watch for Christmas.
I would like to tell her to pay back our two friends. She doesn’t know that I know she owes them money.
Can I ask her nicely to pay them back or should I just stay quiet? I feel awkward every time I talk to her.
— Pennsylvania
DEAR PENNSYLVANIA: What a seductive question. Its answers are all so simple: You can potentially salvage two friendships just by saying, “Pay them back first.” You can give responsible money advice against frills. You can avoid exposing your friends’ indiscretion just by biting your tongue.
But combined these get complicated, and not just because they’re obviously contradictory; they also involve “fixing” something that isn’t yours to fix.
So make that your true north.
The borrower gets to make her choices and live with the consequences. The lenders made choices, too, and are free to give and receive consequences of their own. As are you: To the borrower’s dubious priorities and to the lenders’ indiscretion, just respond as you see fit. Ignore the impulse to fix.
Unless your friend actually asks you what you think. Then: “If it were my money, I’d invest it — not just throw it away.”
Wife says she needs space, but is separation cruel?
Dear Carolyn: Is a separation cruel? Prolonging the inevitable? In counseling now but I feel claustrophobic, like we can’t have a conversation without the weight of his fear and my frustration overshadowing everything. If I don’t get some space, there’s no way we’ll make it. If I do, we still might not.
I feel I have no choice here – stay in the marriage and make everyone else happy, or leave and make them all miserable. How do you develop your swimming skills when you are sinking in quicksand? Is it wrong to get out and see if you can make your way back?
—Separating
No. It is wrong to act with ulterior motives, but it is not wrong to save yourself first if that is the only way you can envision saving your marriage.
Your calculation is clear – staying will kill the marriage, leaving might kill the marriage – and it says to go. But you can’t take yourself so easily at your own word, not yet. You need to be fiercely honest with yourself about your true goal: Do you want a chance at reconciliation, or do you want out? Both can be valid; this is just not the time to be disingenuous. Or timid.
Read more:
Also keep in mind: Whether separation ultimately saves your marriage is irrelevant. You don’t justify the choice through the outcome, but instead through the careful consideration of your present conditions – which sound bad for you and “everyone else.”
If by “everyone” you mean children, too, then don’t assume staying makes everyone “happy.” Kids’ needs are abundant and clear and best served by stability, yes. An intact home, however, can also be unstable; make decisions toward a family that functions emotionally, not just one that shares space. Push through the weight to say what you need to say.
Dear Carolyn: I have three friends, two with money and one poorer. The poorer one borrowed money from both of my richer friends and has not paid them back. She has gotten some money together, and told me she wants to buy her boyfriend an expensive watch for Christmas.
I would like to tell her to pay back our two friends. She doesn’t know that I know she owes them money.
Can I ask her nicely to pay them back or should I just stay quiet? I feel awkward every time I talk to her.
—Pennsylvania
What a seductive question. Its answers are all so simple: You can potentially salvage two friendships just by saying, “Pay them back first.” You can give responsible money advice against frills. You can avoid exposing your friends’ indiscretion just by biting your tongue.
But combined these get complicated, and not just because they’re obviously contradictory; they also involve “fixing” something that isn’t yours to fix.
So make that your true north.
The borrower gets to make her choices and live with the consequences. The lenders made choices, too, and are free to give and receive consequences of their own. As are you: To the borrower’s dubious priorities and to the lenders’ indiscretion, just respond as you see fit. Ignore the impulse to fix.
Unless your friend actually asks you what you think. Then: “If it were my money, I’d invest it – not just throw it away.”
Email Carolyn at tellme@washpost.com, follow her on Facebook at www.facebook.com/carolyn.hax or chat with her online at noon Eastern time each Friday at www.washingtonpost.com.
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Marriage Advice From Top Christian Celebrities
You probably have heard a lot of advice about how to keep a successful Christian marriage. Veteran couples further down the road look back on young newlyweds and offer insight for the challenges ahead. They might say things like “keep God at the center of your marriage” or “pray together each night.”
Being a married Christian isn’t easy, but what’s even more difficult is when you place fame on top of it. Hollywood has never been a fan of faith, yet these celebrity Christian couples are here to show you can make true commitments. Through their dedication to faith, and each other, these couples are proving that God always has things under control. No matter how famous.
Here is how these celebrities have been able to make it last for decades. Their advice will inspire you to work hard in your marriage, and see where God can take you.
