Category Archives: Marriage & Divorce
Dr. Heavenly Kimes from 'Married to Medicine' has love advice for 2019 – FOX 5 Atlanta
ATLANTA (FOX 5 Atlanta) – It’s reunion time on “Married to Medicine” as the women dig into the highs and lows of season six and stir up new drama.
Dentist and relationship expert Dr. Heavenly Kimes visited Good Day Atlanta talk about the show and explosive reunion. Plus she’s got some New Year’s love advice.
For more information on “Married to Medicine,” click here. For more Dr. Heavenly Kimes follow her on Twitter @Dr_Heavenly.
Expert Tips for Dating After Divorce – The Cheat Sheet
Are you ready to start a new relationship? | nd3000/iStock / Getty Images Plus
Moving forward after your marriage has ended is challenging. One challenge you will likely face is figuring out how and when to navigate the dating scene. The Cheat Sheet spoke with Markie Keelan, a relationship coach and licensed professional counselor candidate. Here’s what Keelan had to share about divorce and dating.
The Cheat Sheet: Dating after divorce can be a nerve-wracking experience. How do you know when you’re ready?
Markie Keelan: When is anyone ready to date? That’s a hard question to answer, but those who are newly divorced or in the process of going through a divorce give it a lot more consideration than the majority of single folks. I think the better question to ask yourself is ‘What do I need to be able to come to a new relationship the way I want to?’ Typically, after a divorce we have a negative self-view on how we do relationships. Give yourself time to heal your connection to self and once you feel like you are ready to meet new people as the person you are proud of, and you are confident you can authentically connect, start putting yourself out there.
CS: Is there a guideline for determining the best time to try dating again?
MK: I’ve heard a while back a general rule of thumb is for every year you were together, wait that many months. But honestly, depending on what the reasons were for the divorce, it could take days, or it could take years to grieve this relationship trauma. Don’t let a time frame determine your journey toward love.
CS: What are some pros and cons of dating while you’re separated?
Dating while separated has some pros and cons. | iStock.com/AntonioGuillem
MK: Some pros of dating when not legally divorced include speeding up the process of “letting go” of the failed marriage. Many people can punish themselves due to feeling like a failure in their marriage. Don’t punish yourself. Reflection is wonderful, but be honest with yourself, notice what you would like to change, and put action to your thoughts. I also consider a pro of dating prior to becoming legally divorced is your ability to see what’s out there. Maybe you are unsure if you really want to go through with the divorce. Try dating to see if this divorce is the right choice for you.
The con of dating before legally divorced includes potentially becoming involved with someone who is uncomfortable with your legal status of married still. Make sure you are being honest with your partners to avoid awkward conversations in the future.
CS: How can you heal after divorce?
MK: A great method of healing after divorce is a commitment to healing your heart. Some relationships can be similar to an addiction to another person. Take your time and be gentle with yourself when it comes to your process of healing; everyone is different. You may be more or less triggered than you suspected you would be. Go with your own progress and try to let go of negative judgments of yourself.
Check out The Cheat Sheet on Facebook!
Widower’s daughter still misses mom, but shouldn’t punish stepmom – Detroit Free Press
Adapted from a recent online discussion.
Dear Carolyn: My husband is a widower with three kids. His youngest daughter, “Danielle,” is getting married. My two stepsons have been much more welcoming to me since I entered the family than Danielle has. I approached this by being loving to Danielle but non-intrusive, and hoping she will come around. I never expect to replace her mother, but I do hope we can be friends. At best, she is polite to me.
Throughout wedding planning, Danielle hasn’t been any different and I didn’t really expect her to be.
Recently she had some seating charts out. Danielle wants her father in the front row during the ceremony, with an empty seat next to him in honor of her mother. I am asked to sit wherever I want on the bride’s side beyond the first row. During the dinner, I am not seated with my husband or the immediate family, who are all sitting together.
I am considering asking my husband to ask Danielle to reconsider. I haven’t yet because I wanted to see if I would settle and not care as much.
– I Still Care
The kindest interpretation I can reach for is that Danielle is still grieving her mother significantly. Life milestones without Mom would only make her feel only more raw and emotional.
This doesn’t mean she can mistreat you. I just point it out because she might be blind to her rudeness, and even feel justified. Can’t punch fate for taking her mother, right? But she can take all kinds of anger out on you.
Read more:
After marriage and baby, friend wants his pal back
Husband routinely makes plans without consulting his wife
And her grief will tell her, “My mother belongs next to Dad at my wedding! Stepmom has a lot of nerve.”
It’s the worldview of a 5-year-old, but hardly rare.
Your pain is valid, too – plus you have common decency on your side, so, yes, talk to your husband. Just don’t minimize her pain when you do it; her actions are the problem, not her feelings.
So, with compassion blazing: “The seating chart is a shrine to her mother. I feel for her. But I don’t appreciate being banished and humiliated just to make it happen. I think any intervention will be better coming from you.”
Thoughts from the congregation:
– I do agree the stepdaughter is not treating her fairly. But I wonder if the better long-term play here is to abide by Danielle’s wishes. It requires nothing other than swallowing your pride. It’s not fair, but you’re dealing with someone working through intense ongoing pain. Perhaps this is just a gift you can provide to her.
– Wondering
– I just cannot imagine not seating the couple together. That is just reprehensible. It is … unbelievable, actually. Dad should ABSOLUTELY say something. If Danielle wants an empty seat for her mom – I get that – then allow stepmom on the other side.
– Flabbergasted
– The husband-to-be should have stepped up here. The father can also say: “Honey, I know you must be missing your mom terribly. Seating your stepmother in Siberia isn’t really a way to honor your mom, and I don’t think it’s something your mother would have done in your place. It’s also hurtful to me to not be able to sit with my wife.
– Anonymous
Email Carolyn at tellme@washpost.com, follow her on Facebook at www.facebook.com/carolyn.hax or chat with her online at noon Eastern time each Friday at www.washingtonpost.com.
Read or Share this story: https://www.freep.com/story/life/advice/2019/01/08/stepmom-daughter-wedding/2472922002/
Nasser Sultan's advice to Married at First Sight's 2019 contestants – Now To Love
Dear 2019 MAFS contestants,
Congratulations on making it onto one of TV’s most dysfunctional shows!
Every secret you’ve ever had is about to be exposed, your life put into other people’s hands and, in the time it takes you to read this letter, your marriage will probably be over.
But by God you’re going to have some fun!
So what is the best advice I, Nasser, can offer you?
Delete everything.
Wipe your Instagram, get a new Facebook account and request every dick pic you’ve dared to send, to come back.
The things you don’t even remember typing will soon come back to haunt you, so get rid of it… ASAP!
You thought filming went well? It’s never going to turn out the way you expected.
The producers will have the final say in how you come across and there’s nothing you can do about it.
Well, he thought he’d walk away from our season a hero for managing a marriage to Tracey for so long but he became Australia’s most hated man in a split second.
I was edited as a villain because I didn’t want to sleep with my wife who happened to wear a wig. She didn’t want to sleep with me either, but that magical edit made it seem like she was longing for little Nass to make a cameo.
They’re clever… You’re probably in the midst of being manipulated right now and have no idea.
All I can say is: just go along with it.
WATCH NEXT: Married at First Sight’s Nasser’s breakdown during home stays
So here’s my advice…
If you’re the villain, be the worst villain that show has ever seen. Your life is now a pantomime so you may as well put on a show.
If you fancy making some money, book every personal appearance, opening of an envelope and Z-list event you can manage – remember, you will want to stay relevant.
If you want to stay in the spotlight, turn your Instagram into one big advert while people are still paying for you to post about their teeth whitener.
Because once the next season arrives. It’s over.
Think your famous now? Every day your fame becomes less and less and people will start to forget you.
Milk it as much as you can.
Sadly you’ll never be as famous as Nasser, I’m one of a kind – but if you take my advice, you’ll last longer than most of your co-stars.
And remember – once that first episode airs, it’s GAME ON.
Lots of love,
Nasser xx
P.S It’s likely you’re going to hate your new husband/wife after a couple of days, so try and seal the deal on the first night while you still kind of enjoy each other’s company…
