Relationships Talk

Cancer

Birthday: June 21-July 22

Type: Cardinal water sign

Key words: Emotional, nurturing, protective, intuitive, sentimental

Love anthem: “The Shallow” – Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper

Famous Gemini men: Daniel Radcliffe, Tom Hanks, Jaden Smith, Post Malone, Pauly D, Nick Offerman, Milo Ventimiglia, Vin Diesel

Best matches:

Best Matches: When it comes to a perfect match for Cancer, Scorpio easily takes the cake. The two water signs share emotional compatibility and a lot of similar values when it comes to security, trust, and commitment. Taurus is another great match for Cancer—both are slow-moving, loyal, and love to get comfy and cozy. The Moon’s fave sign is Cancer, but its second fave is Taurus, so they share that lunar connection as well.

As the first water sign of the Zodiac, Cancer is intuitive and sensitive, and as a cardinal sign, he’s motivated to make intimate emotional connections that promise to last. At first, this shy guy probably can’t even look your way without blushing and turning away. He’s prone to overthinking things and might not be able to approach you, but if you make the first moves, he’ll hold on tight and do anything for you. Cancer is incredibly nurturing, committed, and protective of his loved ones, and does everything in his power to make sure you’re comfortable and feel safe with him.

Your Cancer boy is the king of cuddle puddles. He’s ruled by the Moon, which in astrology represents feelings, and one’s inner self. As a result, he’s sweet, romantic, and a total softie. If you like to spend quiet evenings with your boo on the couch, watching Netflix and resting your head on his shoulder, look for a Cancer! He loves to spend time at home as opposed to lots of traveling and socializing. Crabs live in their shell, and carry their home on their back wherever they go. They’re slow-moving critters, too. Your Cancer man is the same—he’s a homebody, and a relationship with him moves along gently and steadily, with no alarms or surprises.

Being a water sign, there’s an abundance of emotion in his soul and he needs to feel comfortable enough to express his feelings with you. He takes trust and commitment very seriously, needing a lot of reassurance and open communication. Sure, he’s a great listener and is amazingly receptive, but actively expressing his own emotions isn’t the easiest. Without encouragement from you, he can keep his feelings bottled up. But if you invite him to open up, he’ll share a rainbow of emotions with you!

Cancer wants a relationship that feels like home, so there’s a certain amount of security he requires. Hookups aren’t really his thing, because he knows that if he’s physically intimate with someone, he catches feels quick. And, in general, it’ll take you a while to get out of the talking phase with him, but once he feels safe, he’s committed. Sexually, he’s a true romantic above anything else, and looks for intimate and erotic moments to get him going. Sex is slow, with lots of body contact and emotional connection, mirroring the overall relationship.

Of course, this abundance of emotion can backfire when he’s not in a good mood. His sensitivity and need for assurance can make him really needy and draining at times. And yes, while his commitment to you is obviously a huge plus, the flip side to that is it can turn to clinginess. You might struggle to do anything by yourself, and when you address it, he might take it the wrong way and think you just don’t like him. So look for a Cancer who has a strong passion or hobby outside of his relationships (a good rule of thumb for all partners, TBH).

He also can get very passive and quiet. He’ll follow your lead and is very compliant in providing you with what you want, but won’t speak up if he feels neglected (even if his feelings of being ignored are just a wistful by-product of his eternal moodiness). Instead, he recedes further into his shell, and if you aren’t able to coax him out fast enough, he might lash out with those claws of his.

This guy has a lot of walls and only lets them down when he’s 100 percent sure he can trust you, so open up! When he’s ready to go to the next level in your relationship, he will, but pushing him out of his comfort zone in any way is a big no-no. If you’re together, he’ll put his heart in your hands, so be extra careful with it! Ragging too much on the parts of himself he’s insecure about is a surefire way to start drama. He’s full of love and will forgive you, but a Cancer never forgets. But if you’re looking for someone who you can be extra, unabashedly cheesy with, he’s your lobster, er, crab.

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A little over three years ago, the petite, platinum blonde enigma known as Poppy uploaded her first post on YouTube: one minute and 22 seconds’ worth of herself simply eating cotton candy. Whether or not there was any deeper meaning to that pastel pink repast remains unknown, though the response to the video alone, which has racked up 3.5 million views to date, led Poppy to upload hundreds and hundreds more. By now, there are 400,000,000 YouTube views on her channel.

As entertaining as clips of Poppy interviewing a plant and reading aloud the Bible are, Poppy’s videos have also found such an intrigued audience because they’re one of the only texts available to those looking for an answer to the central riddle of Poppy: Is Poppy even human?

The Poppy who “come[s] from the internet” might not be, but the 23-year-old Poppy who described her avatar’s origins as such on a recent afternoon is most definitely living and breathing—an accomplishment for anyone, really, who’d just flown in from a few days of partying at Art Basel Miami Beach. Perched on the edge of a couch and clutching a pale blue phone case that she’d covered in kawaii beads herself, Poppy maintained her usual poise, but also spoke in a notably less robotic and slightly deeper voice than the one so familiar to her followers. (The video of her simply repeating “I’m Poppy” for 10 minutes has nearly 19 million views.)

But that was hundreds of videos ago, and there was a much more pressing one on her plate: a three-part holiday gift guide series she produced for W (you can see the first video above), featuring champagne sabers and selfie drones (with the usual sense of disquiet unique to Poppy). As usual, she was working in tandem with the musician-director Titanic Sinclair, who’d also been with her in Miami—and pretty much everywhere she’s gone for the past year. Oh, and he’s also the only person Poppy follows on Instagram—at least on her main account. Learn more about her finsta, exes, and other IRL matters of interest she opened up about while answering W‘s Social Q’s, here.

Do you remember your first Instagram?

It was a shorter version of the Poppy Eats Cotton Candy video that I put up on YouTube. It seems to be a lot more popular recently, but I don’t think a lot of people saw it when it was first posted.

You only follow one person, Titanic. How long has that been the case?

A little over a year now. When you only follow a smaller amount of people, you get to see all of their posts. And I try not to pay attention to what other people are doing—I try to just stay in my own world.

About how many did you follow before that?

Maybe 25? It was mostly just fashion brands that I like: Miu Miu, Chanel, and Rodarte. And Louis Vuitton, of course.

Do you have a finsta?

I do… but it’s a secret. Is that the name for it, finsta? I just call it my secret page. Now anyone listening to this will try to find me, but they can’t! All of my friends have secret pages, and I follow people, but I don’t have any followers on that account.

Which accounts do you look at, whether you follow them or not?

Tame Impala, Rick Owens, Jack White, Alison Mosshart from the Kills, Yoko Ono, Cornelius, and my producers. And I follow a lot of art galleries—my friend curates the Corey Helford Gallery in Los Angeles.

What about Marilyn Manson? I hear that you’re friends now.

Yeah, it’s very funny that that happened. He’s a wonderful person, and extremely intelligent—I think he and Titanic make sense as friends. [Laughs.]

As an expert in the field, what would you suggest giving him for the holidays?

Ooh, something scary. Maybe something dead, like some bones or something.

What are your tips for taking a good selfie?

I get my photos taken, but I don’t take a lot of selfies. I know what I look like, so I don’t think I need to save a bunch of photos that I took of myself or post them on the internet. I’ve posted them before, but it has to be a really good one.

Any tips for getting your photo taken, then?

You just gotta always be ready for it—and you better cover up your entire face and head if you’re not. But I suggest you wear makeup and have your hair done at all times.

Filter or #nofilter?

Well, filters make everything look better. So why not make everything look better?

What’s your favorite thing to post?

Photos from live performance; photos of my cat, Pi; and photos of places that I get to visit, like this one of me in Milan at the Duomo. We were there for Fashion Week, for Fendi, then we went to the Prada museum, which is really inspiring. That’s why I went to Art Basel. I’d like to have my own gallery show next year.

What type of art do you make?

I like to paint still life, but it’s as told by Poppy, so that’s what you get. [Laughs.]

Do you have any social media-related pet peeves?

I wish people could just post and forget about it, as opposed to checking back in. I’ve seen people become almost neurotic with obsessing over who’s checking their Instagram stories or liking their posts. Kanye West said there should be social media that exists where you can’t see the numbers, and I’m sure if that was to be made, people wouldn’t be neurotic about it.

Would you also want that to exist?

Yeah, I think it makes sense. I love social media, because without it, I wouldn’t be here. But everybody has a voice, and there’s a lot of people talking, so there’s a lot of room for error or misinformation. It’s like when you’re little and you play a game of Telephone—it starts out one way, and by the time it gets to the end of the line, it’s something completely different. It’s kind of like that multiplied by… well, however many people are on the internet. [Laughs.] Things always end up being morphed into things so far from their origins.

Do you find yourself constantly checking things, too, or have you always had more of a hands-off approach?

I feel like I’ve had a hands-off approach, because there’s so much in my life that I want to create, to entertain people. And if I’m constantly checking in on what other people’s opinions are, that would weigh into what I’m creating. It might steer me off my path of intention.

Do you ever read the comments?

I used to, but now there’s too many. And I think now I have a very clear intention and vision for what I want, and I don’t want anybody else to distract me from that.

Do you ever read your DMs?

I do, but not on Twitter or Instagram—just on this site I’ve created called poppy.church. We have a chat room for the church’s “guardians,” who I handpick to protect it, and I always read their DMs.

Do you have any tips for sliding into someone else’s DMs?

It’s always nice to start with a compliment, and then you just see where it goes from there. I do it with different artists sometimes, when it seems right.

What about people you’re into romantically?

It’s funny to say, when I come from the internet, but no. I think when you’re trying to start a relationship online, it’s a little… it seems a little foreign to me. I know a lot of people do it, but I don’t think it’s for me.

Do you ever unfollow or block your exes?

I don’t really have any. Um, yeah…

I don’t really either.

[Laughs.]

Is there anything you would never post?

Photos of food. Unless it was cute food.

How come?

Because food’s boring.

How do you unplug?

I turn off all of the technology. You have to restart fresh in the morning, so I turn it off every night.

Everything? Do you have an alarm clock?

No, I just have a Poppy clock. My body wakes me up every day at 7 a.m.

Related: Poppy IRL: Meet the Internet’s Most Mysterious It Girl as She Takes New York Fashion Week by Storm

Legendary “Millionaire Matchmaker” Patti Stanger has high praise for the Beverly Hills-based Matchmakers In The City. She calls the young co-founders  — sisters Cristina Conti Pineda and her sister Alessandra Conti — the “new generation of matchmakers.”

Patti’s endorsement rings true, as the Conti sisters are developing a unique brand of matchmaking services for their clients. The practice includes one-on-one meetings, but the sisters also share their insights through podcasting, blogging, and TV appearances. Alessandra was even chosen as the matchmaker for seasons seven and eight of MTV’s romance-oriented reality show “Are You the One?”

“She interviewed and helped to choose all the matches for the show; 2018 has been a year of immense growth,” Cristina said.

From Alessandra’s perspective: “2018 was a year filled with lots and lots of love for Matchmakers In The City. Our matchmakers have been responsible for engagements, marriages, and even a few Matchmakers In The City babies.”

The team of matchmakers offer their services to singles in Los Angeles, New York, San Francisco, and Washington D.C., but even those who don’t live in these cities can receive advice through their online content. Their podcast, Dating in the City, is updated monthly and answers questions, including “What does it mean if someone is on social media too much?” and “Are astrological matches useful?” The sisters’ blog is also filled with down-to-earth tips.

Matchmakers In The City has seen monumental success since the sisters combined their matchmaking talent, entrepreneurial spirit, and business know-how to launch it in 2011, and they now have a team of matchmakers in Los Angeles, New York, San Francisco, and Washington D.C., who are working with individual clients across the country — and a few throughout the world.

Cristina attributes the business’ success to the sisters doing things the right way.

“When you’re doing something well, people take notice, and it snowballs,” she said. “That’s why a matchmaking company is not something you can build overnight. It takes many years of trust, hiring the right people, and having the right company culture.”

The Goal: Real-World Connections for Frustrated App Users

Many of Matchmakers In The City’s clients are recovering dating app users. For many unsuccessful daters, apps can seem like a godsend because they’re convenient and hold the promise that compatibility can be just a click away. However, dating apps can force users to put in a lot of time and energy, and they often don’t see any results, Cristina said.

“There’s a backlash from dating online. People think it will be a quick fix to meet people, but it poses many other problems they’re not expecting,” she said.

“I think that now, more than ever, people are getting fed up with the apps and online dating. They crave a more authentic and genuine connection, which is why I believe matchmaking has been such a popular option in the past few years,” Alessandra added.

For example, some unhappy dating app users find matches who are only interested in hookups, not in real relationships. Others may be lying about their identities or where they live.

In contrast, Matchmakers In The City takes away that uncertainty about a person’s truthfulness. The team thoroughly reviews clients, chooses matches, and receives peer reviews about the matches they’ve created from other matchmakers on staff.

“We provide background checks for all our clients, so we know they’re being truthful about where they live and work. You don’t get that on an app or online,” Cristina said.

Further, they try to ensure that matches in the service’s database are authentically seeking relationships.

“Everyone has to be looking for love. They have to be ready to meet the right person for their lives,” Cristina said. “We’re so much above the fray, which is why clients value us.”

This kind of personalized service helps differentiate Matchmakers In The City from the crowded dating app industry by providing security and confidence. With a matchmaker’s help, clients don’t have to worry about being ghosted or used; instead, they can focus on what matters: compatibility and long-term possibilities.

Coaching Sessions Can Set Singles Free from Instagram-Perfect Expectations

While the oversaturation of dating apps has discouraged daters, so has the spread of social media-perfect photos. Though most people know there are tools to make men and women look better online than they do in real life, this phenomenon can mean that women aspire to look like these images and men seek impossibly beautiful women.

“They’re looking at Instagram photos and saying, ‘That’s what I want.’ Apps that make people look perfect are contributing to singles being less willing to connect with real people,” Cristina said.

Matchmakers In The City offers personalized coaching that encourages daters to be realistic about their expectations. One of these coaches’ most difficult tasks is ensuring clients recognize looks are not the most important part of a relationship.

The Matchmakers In The City team of matchmakers helps singles move past appearance and focus on compatibility.

“It takes time to unwind from physical perfection because singles see it everywhere,” Cristina said. “We like our clients to go through social media cleanses because it can be problematic, especially for men. It can make them antisocial and unable to have a real relationship.”

After the matchmakers coach their clients on being realistic about their expectations of another person’s appearance, they encourage clients to choose the five inner qualities they want in a long-term partner or spouse. They don’t ask clients to change themselves or their values, just to be realistic about whether their needs are even achievable.

“The matchmakers get to know our bachelors and bachelorettes and bring them back to reality,” Cristina said. “We don’t ask them to compromise on the five inner qualities they’re looking for in their future spouse. Qualities like trustworthiness and reliability are so important in future husbands and wives.”

The Team of Matchmakers are Building More Relationships With Daters and Matchmakers Around the Country

Since Matchmakers In The City was founded in 2011, it has developed a reputation for creating high-quality matches. The combination of its careful policies, client-centered focus, and commitment to authenticity have led to many successful relationships, engagements, and marriages.

“It’s really an art to be a matchmaker. Reliability is important, and a lot of companies fail because they can’t provide that kind of consistency. People see our results, and that’s why our business has grown,” Cristina said.

Another uncommon aspect of Matchmakers In The City is that it doesn’t compete with other services. While the company is always looking to expand its clientele, the company recognizes that it can’t make matches for everyone. Instead, it works with other agencies to provide quality referrals.

“It’s all about creating a beautiful relationship that will change the world in beautiful ways.” — Cristina Conti Pineda, Co-Founder of Matchmakers In The City

“A big part of our job is revolutionizing the dating agency by changing the policies we have in place in our company,” said Cristina. “ We want to help as many people as possible, but we can’t help the entire population of singles.”

“It’s been seven years of bringing people who would have never met together, helping them become the best versions of themselves through working with our experts and matchmakers, and being a support system for them through the trials and tribulations of dating,” Alessandra said. “It is one of the most rewarding jobs in the world, and we have been honored to work with thousands of men and women who have trusted us with such an important element of their lives.”

Cristina developed this interest in helping many people find love because she herself found a happy marriage — through an introduction from her sister. Both Cristina and her sister think of their profession as more than a job, but rather a passion to help people find happy relationships. And while a real relationship may not be as perfect as depicted on social media, it can help both partners find fulfillment in themselves and their pairings.

These positive, loving unions help more than just the people in them, according to Matchmakers In The City. The Conti sisters said they believe healthy relationships have a significant impact on society.

“It’s all about creating a beautiful relationship that will change the world in beautiful ways,” Cristina said.