Relationships Talk

Are you trying to date while dealing with depression? Or, are you dating someone who has depression? Either way, relationships can present you with a whole host of emotions that might throw you and depression for a loop.

If you’re wondering how to date when depression is a factor, check out the tips in part one of this video by Practical Psychology.

As a single girl trying to ace that career, exercise well, eat right, maintain her sanity, and still make time to hang out with friends and family, it often makes me stop and wonder if I’ll actually end up forever alone. I mean, how many men will I need to sort through before I meet ‘the one’? And most importantly, how long will this gruelling process take? Should I assign months, years, or even decades? Mathematically speaking, that’s a helluva lot of precious time swiping left and right, making small talk, and crying over heartbreaks.

Okay, no one can actually give me an exact number or time frame because it’ll probably happen when I least expect it, but according to Tala Scott, founder of Evolve Today and relationship expert and author, there are seven men I will meet before I meet my perfect match – and this applies for all women. In Scott’s new book ‘Heaven on Earth Begins: the Seven Stages of Love’, she does exactly that – investigates the seven stages of dating before you find Mr Right.

Scott wants us to stop making the same mistakes, stop dating the same f**kboys, and instead make sure we women find that long-term happiness we all deserve. But to do this, Scott advises you have to kiss seven types of Mr Wrong until you find your Mr Darcy. So, which one’s have you ticked off? And who are you yet to tick off?

1. Mr Grey

AKA 50 Shades of mood swings/mixed messages/knowing the unknown.

“He wants you close enough to exercise control, but never closer than arm’s length emotionally,” Scott says. “His intrigue is a product of being emotionally distant, and he still carries the baggage of his first heartbreak. Don’t think you can change him! Love should not be difficult.” Amen, sister.

2. Mr McDreamy

Scott describes this as the person who “feels like your soul-mate” and the relationship “is a fulfilling and beautiful experience.”

“This loving relationship based on care and mutual understanding, arms you with the tools and knowledge of how to love.”

If it doesn’t work out between the two of you, don’t cry because Scott advises that this relationship will have taught you self-mastery and inner confidence – two qualities that will make you the ultimate #bosslady.

3. Mr Unavailable

“Mr Unavailable can’t offer you one or more of these connections: heart, body, soul and mind,” Scott explains. “This relationship isn’t a complete, full love. This man is emotionally, mentally or physically unavailable.” And he needs to be said goodbye to. ASAP.

4. Mr Upgrade

“Mr Upgrade has a strong connection to your soul and an even better understanding of the real you. There is a spiritual magnetism to your relationship, and an attraction to the soul.”

But as perfect as it may seem, there is one significant flaw: “… this soulful attraction often can’t translate due to an unhealed past relationship that will interfere with your intimate connection.”

5. Mr Variety

If you haven’t seen the film ‘The Other Woman’, then add it to your holiday to-do list – now. Basically, Cameron Diaz, Leslie Mann and Kate Upton play three women who are all romantically involved with the same douche bag AKA Mr Variety.

Scott describes this type as “the charming centre of attention that can’t seem to keep his eyes on one girl.”

“This heartthrob will be in and out of your life in a flash once the connection gets too intense for him, leaving you burning for more and wondering what went wrong.” Girlfriend, this one has danger written all over it. Save yourself the heartbreak and time.

6. Mr Duality

“Mr Duality is your twin in terms of your values, thoughts and strengths, with a deep sense of care and protection in your relationship.”

Sounds like Mr Darcy, right?

Well… “There is always some sort of difficulty when it comes to entering a committed relationship, and it is often due to unrequited romantic love.”

7. Mr Darcy

Simply put, every girl deserves to find their very own Colin Firth, ahem, I mean Mr Darcy.

“Your search is over when you meet your love of a lifetime, Mr Darcy. The love is complete in the heart, body, soul and mind, and the love is unconditional. He sees nothing but perfection and beauty in you and makes you see it in yourself, too. This Divine Union Relationship shows you how easy true love can really be!”

True love does exist, and it’s waiting for you out there.

Tala’s book ‘Heaven on Earth Begins: The Seven Stages of Love’ is currently available to purchase here.

For more like this, this is the average number of sexual partners each generation has had, and if you have this personality type, you’re probably having way more sex FYI.

AN AMERICAN woman had Scots in stitches over the weekend as she begged the internet for advice on how to flirt with a “sexy Scottish librarian.”

The woman asked users on Reddit for information about dating customs up north after being told that she may be too forward for her Scots crush.

After sparking up a romance with the sexy Scot, the woman took to Reddit for advice

She wrote: “I’ve met a wonderful Scottish man who’s expressed romantic interest, but I know absolutely nothing about dating customs in Scotland or anything about Scottish folk.

“I’ve looked and can’t find anything except that ‘dating isn’t a thing in Scotland’ and ‘Scottish men don’t like forward behaviour’ and that American women tend to be too ‘forward’ and ‘not nurturing’.”

“So now I feel like I may accidentally disrespect him or put him off!”

The woman then went on to explain a hilarious conversation she had with the man as he checked out her library books, joking that she “nearly died” after the encounter.

“Our first conversation was when I checked out a book about wolves and he leaned over the desk to whisper that wolves were his favourite animal because they’re fiercely protective of their women in this f*****g sexy voice. Well of course I nearly died.”

This is the most popular Scot on Tinder as dating app reveals top 30 Brits users swipe right for and their opening lines

She added: “He’s very ‘forward’ himself but I don’t know how to respond after reading that American women come across too forward.

“Do you guys really not date? What happens then?

“Should I say ‘Okay sexy Scottish man, you keep flirting and I like you too’?”

Naturally, Scots gave plenty of advice in the comments – and their responses were hilarious.

One user joked: “It’s custom here to gift a potential partner a neep (turnip) hollowed out and filled with sand and thistles.

“It’s an ancient tradition which shows the entwined nature of life.”

Another wrote: “Go haggis hunting!” while another said: “If he likes you he’ll give you with a magpie he has caught and painted red.

“You should stroke it 23 times from beak to tail then throw it in a river.

“If it flies you’ll have a long and happy union, if not it’ll get wet and this symbolises the romance (like old Irn Bru) is doomed.”

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There are certain things we just can’t control, like a delayed train or a rainy day, but stealing your friend’s boyfriend isn’t one of them.

But one woman has confessed that she can’t stop going after unavailable men, namely the guys her friends are dating.

Posing her dilemma in an advice question on The Cut, she explained how she “desperately” doesn’t want to be the kind of person who “tries to win the affections of a guy who is clearly off the market”.

But we’re not convinced.

The girl says she just can’t help it – she always seems to steal her friends’ boyfriends. (Getty)

The woman’s story includes not one, not two, but three times she’s gone after a guy who is spoken for.

“When I was in high school, I drunkenly made out with my friend’s prom date,” the girl begins.

She then tells of how another close high school friend was suspicious of her intentions towards the said friend’s boyfriend, and while “nothing ever happened… it came close.”

And it didn’t end when she left high school.

“In college, I drunkenly made out with a guy friend whom my best friend at the time was interested in,” the girl wrote.

“They weren’t dating, but our hookup violated a “girl code” that cost me my best friendship and seriously damaged my standing in the larger group of friends we were a part of.”

To top it all off, she explains that she’s currently on the path to do it again.

She confesses she has hooked up with the guys her friends were dating while drunk. (Getty)

“I’ve made a new friend, and I’m starting to feel some type of way about her boyfriend,” she confessed.

She says that in past situations she would just ignore those feelings “until I inevitably drank too much, my inhibitions would fly out the window, and everything would come shooting to the surface.”

The woman goes on to blame the repeated boy-stealing as a result of her “unbearably cliché daddy issues” and says that she “can’t keep letting this continue”, but also seems to want the problem to just “magically disappear”.

Unfortunately things just don’t work that way, and The Cut were quick to tell her that.

“You’re not a fool for unrequited love. You’re an emotional terrorist on a single-minded quest,” wrote Heather Havrilesky.

“You want to compete with and then punish other women. You want to win, while they watch.”

Though the girl paints herself as a victim, it’s pretty clear who’s in the wrong. (Unsplash)

The words may be harsh, but they ring true.

The article outlines that while the girl paints herself as a victim of situations she just happens to fall into, the truth is that she’s the one pursuing unavailable guys over and over again.

One thing’s for sure – we certainly wouldn’t want this girl as our best friend!