Tag Archives: dating advice
Got Dating App Fatigue? Here's How To Deal
And if you’re sick of swiping but still want to meet someone, there are other ways to do that, too. Apps might make it easier for some of us to put ourselves out there, but Tinder, Bumble, and OkCupid aren’t the be-all, end-all. Still, if you are on dating apps, it’s easy to feel FOMO when there are literally millions of people across different dating apps and the options seem so limitless. But if you’re more exhausted by your options than you are excited, take note of Sussman’s advice and know that you have time to date and maintain your sanity.
LOL! Jay Cutler Teases ''Gameless'' Kristin Cavallari and BFF Kelly for ''Stalking'' Men on Instagram on Very Cavallari
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Kristin Cavallari “created the game” when it comes to dating!
So it only makes sense that she helps her best friend Kelly navigate the “whole dating world” in this clip from the premiere of Very Cavallari. If only husband Jay Cutler was more helpful in this endeavor!
“It’s kind of like living vicariously through her,” the mother of three notes in a confessional. “Jay and I don’t have that like, ‘OMG he just texted me! I have little butterflies in my stomach!'”
“I would take my relationship now over any of that, but it’s just fun for me to relive those new and exciting feelings through Kelly,” Kristin further adds.
Specifically, The Hills alum wisely advises Kelly about what to say while slipping into the Instagram DM of a Canadian suitor. However, while struggling with writer’s block, the besties turn to the NFL quarterback for advice.
E!
“He’s gonna roll his eyes so hard,” a giddy Kelly quips to Kristin.
And you know what? Kelly isn’t wrong!
“You guys met him one time and you’re stalking him on social media,” Jay jokes after learning the situation.
Nonetheless, after Kelly’s beau responds quickly to her message, Jay gets invested and advises her to chill a bit. “Give it an hour,” Cutler states to his wife and friend. When the girls don’t heed his advice, he accuses them of being “gameless.”
Clearly over Jay’s criticism, Kristin reminds her man that she “created the game!”
Watch the moment play out in the clip above!
Watch the premiere of Very Cavallari Sunday, July 8 at 10 p.m., only on E!
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Advice: For anyone dating past 30, Carrie Bradshaw lives
It’s been 20 years since “Sex and the City” first aired, starting an entirely new cultural phenomenon.
It’s been 20 years since “Sex and the City” first aired, starting an entirely new cultural phenomenon.
Photo: HBO
I always wanted to be the real-life Carrie Bradshaw.
I remember watching “Sex and the City,” one episode after the other, season after season. It never ceased to amaze me. I was in awe of it and the lives these ladies lived, though Carrie was the most relatable character to me. Everything about this show was fascinating: their jobs, clothes, parties, brunches, social lives and above all, their dating experiences.
Whoever came up with these scenarios must have had a brilliant imagination, I always thought. Fast-forward 20 years as I currently binge watch the anniversary marathon and reflect on my own life. I never knew how real this show was, until it became my truth.
When it comes to dating over the age of 30, this show had it pegged, as crazy and far-fetched as it seems. Who knew “Sex and the City” would have been the crystal ball that told our future.
There’s a particular episode where the ladies are brunching and Miranda declares that single men over 30 are all “freaks.” Either they’re all commitment phobic, playboys or weirdos. They wonder why it’s so hard to find a normal guy and why there are so many more “normal” single women than men on the market.
I LOL as I recall some of the episodes. The young man who had a filthy apartment and no toilet paper, the “we” guy who painted a beautiful picture of his and Samantha’s future and said whatever it took just to get in her pants, the talk-dirty-to-me guy who was way too vocal in bed, the sloppy kisser who was perfect until he licked Charlotte’s entire face, the socially inept dweeb with halitosis who Samantha tried to transform into the perfect man after she got stood up by someone else, the charming cheater Samantha was crazy about, Mr. Average who only dated models, the commitment-phobe who told Carrie he was in therapy for losing interest once he slept with a woman, right after sleeping with her, and it goes on and on.
This is not a man-bashing session. There are plenty of great men out there, they are just harder to find. And sometimes women don’t give them a chance (at least not right away).
In another episode, Carrie decides to conduct some research. She interviews men who are over 30, single and actively dating. Some of what these guys had to say was unsettling and infuriating. “It’s our turn now,” one guy said. “Do you remember how things were when girls were young and hot and we got rejected? Well, now it’s our turn to have our pick of the litter.”
My mouth hung open as I heard these words coming through my television. Was this true? Are men motivated by all the options out there for them and the lack thereof for the ladies? Does the pressure that women feel due to their age and biological clocks put them into a box marked “desperate”? (Said in Carrie Bradshaw’s voice.)
And then Miranda comes in to represent the ladies. “We’ve waited this long, why should we settle now?” she says. Bravo to that notion, but how do we break this cycle? It’s all fun and games on TV, but how do single women and good, commitment-minded men come together and prevail in the real dating world?
There is a happy ending in real life, just as there was in the show. For the most part, these women ended up with their life partners. Although some of the guys were not what these gals envisioned, they became their dream men. They won the hearts of these strong, fierce, amazing ladies. And there was no settling, only genuine love, respect and adoration. Hang in there ladies, but don’t always count on Mr. Big to come around; give the good guys a chance, too. And fellas, I know you crave companionship just as much as anyone else. Brush up on your dating skills if you must. And open your eyes when you meet a woman of quality. It’s time to recognize and appreciate someone valuable.
The greater the struggle, the greater the reward. That may seem like a cliché outcome made for TV, but I see it as reality.
Julia Bekker, aka the Hunting Maven, is a Connecticut native and matchmaker at huntingmaven.com.
5 Dating Tips That Also Apply To Job Hunting
Know your worth, hun.
As a general rule, jobs and relationships should be kept as separate parts of your life — LinkedIn and Tinder are two apps that you definitely don’t want to get confused.
But the steps you take to land a job aren’t all that different to the dating game. If you’re stuck in a job hunting rut and none of the usual advice seems to be getting you anywhere, try pretending your next interview is a date! It’s just a chance to give someone an insight into who you are and why they should see you again.
“I’m great with Photoshop, I used it all the time at my last job!” OK, so technically you only had to use it once a year ago, but you could probably still do it if you had to… Maybe?
Embellishing a few little details here and there can be tempting. But not only will it be incredibly awkward if you’re caught out, you’ll probably end up in a job you’re not suited for.
At the same time, too much honesty is a bad idea — the interviewer probably doesn’t need to know how much you hated your last boss, for instance. If there are any potential questions you’re worried about, prepare answers beforehand so you don’t freeze up on the spot.
Job hunting, like dating, is ultimately a numbers game. The more jobs you apply for, the closer you are to finding the right one. There’s nothing wrong with interviewing with multiple companies — not only does it give you a chance to perfect your “tell me about yourself” spiel, but it allows you to compare different employers and understand what’s normal practice in your industry.
Whatever you do, make sure you get your facts straight before each interview — it’s pretty much impossible to recover from calling a company or a date the wrong name.
Like a good date, a good job interview is one where conversation flows naturally because you’re genuinely interested in what the other person has to say. It shouldn’t feel like an interrogation.
Also, while your Tinder date might not appreciate you asking them about their trip to Mexico in 2010 the first time you meet, a little pre-interview social media stalking before a job interview is completely fine. Don’t forget you’re interviewing them as much as they’re interviewing you — use it as an opportunity to ask questions and get a sense of what kind of employers they are, and how happy you’d be.
Unless you have super rich parents, chances are you will have to do work you don’t enjoy for companies who see you as replaceable until you get a break in your chosen field.
When you’ve been unemployed for a while it can be tempting to overlook red flags like throwaway racist comments or weirdly personal questions during the interview. But if something feels wrong, trust your gut and know your limits. Don’t do anything that goes against your personal values to the point where it makes you uncomfortable, and make sure your pay matches your experience and qualifications.
Being rejected already sucks, but it’s worse to hear how you were so close to getting the job, but you just “weren’t the right fit” or “another candidate was more suited to the role”. How are you meant to know what to do differently next time?
All you can do is handle the rejection gracefully — don’t blow up their phone or rant on social media about how stupid they were for not choosing you. It might not feel like it right now, but there is an employer out there who will value your skills and want to invest in you.
(Lead image: Broad City/Comedy Central)
