Relationships Talk

DEAR ABBY: I am 25 and have been with my boyfriend on and off for five years. I love him very much. I often overthink things, and a constant frustration of mine is that he makes no romantic gestures at all. He drowns me in compliments and shows his love in other ways.

I always have to take the initiative and suggest he do romantic things like send me cards or flowers, take me to dinner, etc., but he only does them when I ask. It doesn’t feel like enough for me.

I worry that when we get married, over time I will grow bored or no longer be attracted to him because he is so unromantic. Am I just overthinking? What should I do? — ROMANTIC ONE IN AUSTIN

DEAR ROMANTIC: From what you have written it seems that you may be more in love with the idea of romantic gestures than you are with the man you have. Many women would be thrilled to have someone who drowns them with compliments and shows his love in other ways.

If you are truly worried that you will be bored if you marry him or — worse — turned off, then please, turn him loose so he can find someone who appreciates him for who he is, and you can meet someone who will make your dreams come true.

DEAR ABBY: My friend who was suddenly widowed two years ago continues to insert her late husband into every conversation with friends and strangers alike. She’s still depressed, grieving and searching for significance, and she shares it all in person and online.

Early on, she had counseling but no longer feels it necessary. She claims it helps her to talk about him constantly.

Most of us close to her avoid the elephant in the room. I find myself apologizing for her in group gatherings I take her to. People try to offer sympathy, but are surprised when they realize he’s been gone two years.

I endure with love, but wonder if this is the best path. Personally, I want to let him rest in peace. But that’s hard when he’s always “in the room.” Advice? — WANTING TO MOVE FORWARD

DEAR WANTING: Everyone grieves in their own way and on their own timetable. However, your friend may need more support and counseling than you and others she meets socially can offer.

She has my sympathy, but that deeply grieving woman needs to hear what you have written to me. Tell her, as kindly as possible, that she needs to vent to a professional so she can get more help through this difficult period.

DEAR ABBY: A male family friend who is gay works at a local business my wife and I patronize regularly. We always stop and chat when he’s there, but he does something that irritates me. He addresses my wife as “Sweetie.”

My wife thinks I’m being silly because he’s gay; I say one’s sexual orientation doesn’t negate manners and how one man should address another man’s wife. I’m not annoyed to the point that I’d confront the guy, but I promised my wife I’d ask you your opinion. — BOTHERED IN NEW YORK

DEAR BOTHERED: There is nothing rude about a family friend — gay or straight — calling someone’s wife “Sweetie.” My opinion is you should lighten up.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

Good advice for everyone — teens to seniors — is in “The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It.” To order, send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $7 (U.S. funds), to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and handling are included in the price.)

Do you have a list of wedding parties? Then you should try the pub-hopping turns into mandap-hopping. And this year, with such a large amount of A-list Bollywood actors obtaining hitched, there’s no dearth of fashion inspiration once it involves to the wedding wear. Here, we have a tendency to garner a number of the experimental appearance which will regenerate your ancient wear. Take a leaf out of those fashionistas’ books, and switch heads at succeeding wedding you attend.

Try Lehenga with shirt

Lehengas are common in every Indian wedding. However with constant previous styles and colors, it will get a touch monotonous. To bring some drama to the look, add a western touch to that by pairing your bright traditional lehenga with a lucid shirt or a jacket. Make sure that the color of the shirt is well-coordinated together with your lehenga. Although, there’s one golden rule that you just have to be compelled to follow — if your lehenga got a heavy work on style, then keep the shirt plain and vice-versa. You’ll be able to conjointly wear funky jewelry with it.

Try Crop Tops

Crop top are the fashion of this season. The amazing part is that the choices to style these are endless. you’ll be able to wear a lehenga with it or maybe a standard palazzo and therefore the outfit are going to be wedding-ready instantly. The crop top will be of any material from lace to pure cotton, with sequins or frills all you need to do is that the color goes well with the complete outfit.

Try Shirt-Sari

The wedding look for an Indian lady is really incomplete without a wonderful sari. Unless you’re living under a rock, you’ll undoubtedly apprehend that there are multiple ways in which to style a sari. Simply by changing the manner you drape the pallu or twist the pleats, you’ll be able to flip the dress into a rocking apparel. Another way would be altering the design of the blouse. A cold-shoulder or a cape blouse can be a huge head-turner.

Go For A Denim With Long Kurta  

If you are the one who love to wear and lives in denims, then this traditional twist can be perfect for you. Avoiding denims for traditional functions could be a rule that’s long gone. You’ll be able to combine pair a heavy printed, long kurta with your denim. For those that wish to push the bounds, combine your sari with pants. Pencil pants go well with saris and anarkalis.

Dupattas Sari

Capes are the perfect substitution for dupattas. Just like the capes protect our amazing superheroes, they can even save your boring traditional attire too. Be it with a lehenga blouse or with a sari, capes go pretty much with everything. Wearing a cape with a sari can be a little tricky, so make sure that both sari and the cape are not heavy on design. Don’t go overboard with the jewellery while donning a cape.

Also Read: 5 Diet Tips To Manage Your Weight This Wedding Season

An estimated 40 million Americans have student loan debt. While many are seeking to pay off their loan burdens as soon as possible, interest continues to accrue.

The good news is the government wants to help manage those interest payments.

Come tax season, there are a few ways to include your student loans while filing your taxes. And if you’re still in school, a few tax credits might help you as well.

Before considering deductions and credits, knowing the basics of how student loans play into your taxes is essential.

Here are seven tips for navigating your student loans while filing your taxes.

1. Use the student loan interest deduction

The biggest benefit of paying your student loans (besides them eventually being paid off, of course,) is that you can write off interest paid as a deduction, which can potentially help you save hundreds on your tax bill.

You can deduct up to $2,500 through the student loan interest deduction; it does not need to be itemized. Those who have paid $600 or more in interest on their loans will be sent a Form 1098-E from their student loan servicer.

“Even if you’re below the $600, that by itself doesn’t mean that you aren’t able to claim a deduction,” says Eric Bronnenkant, head of tax at Betterment. “It just means you won’t get a tax form from your servicer. But you should still take advantage of the deduction.”

Keep in mind that a tax deduction is different from a tax credit. Under a credit, you subtract the credit amount from your total taxes due; with a deduction, your taxable income is reduced by the deduction amount and you save a percentage of money you aren’t paying taxes on, according to your tax bracket.

The deduction also comes with limits. If you are filing single with an adjusted gross income over $65,000, the deduction starts to lessen until it’s eliminated at $80,000; the same happens for couples filing jointly with an AGI of $135,000 and phases out at $165,000 for a joint return.

Bronnenkant adds that the standard deduction increased this year, and that you don’t need to itemize the student loan deduction — it’s an “above the line” reduction. This means you can claim both the standard deduction and student loan interest deduction, thus lowering your overall tax bill even more, Bronnenkant says.

2. Filing as a dependent

If your parent is claiming you as a dependent, you cannot deduct student loan interest from your overall tax bill.

However, Bronnenkant points out that if someone is helping you pay your student loans, like a parent or grandparent, and is not listing you as a dependent, you can still take advantage of the interest deduction.

“Let’s say you’re 25 years old, on your own, not a dependent anymore,” Bronnenkant says. “Say you’re struggling and your grandparents are paying your student loans to help you get by. That’s fine — that’s actually a good thing. It’s actually assumed the money is gifted to the grandchild, who then pays the interest — and so the grandchild gets the deduction in this scenario.”

3. Watch out for the marriage penalty

The marriage penalty is an industry nickname for a total tax bill being affected by a married couple filing their taxes jointly. Often, joint filing can result in a higher total tax bill than if the couple filed separately.

Bronnenkant says that there aren’t any situations where being married and filing separately would be beneficial while deducting student loan interest on taxes. In fact, married couples filing separately are not eligible for the student loan interest deduction.

4. Take advantage of relevant tax credits if you’re still in school

While those still in school aren’t required to make payments toward their student loans, that doesn’t mean they can’t use their student status to their full advantage on their taxes.

There are two main tax credits for those who are still in school:

The American Opportunity Credit

The American Opportunity Credit is worth up to $2,500 per student per year, but can only be claimed four total tax years per student.

The AOC has strict qualifying requirements, including:

• The student must be attending school at least half-time for at least one academic term.
• The student must not have finished the first four years of a post-secondary program prior to the end of the tax year.
• The student must be pursuing a program that will end with a degree or other recognized credential.

The Lifetime Learning Credit

The Lifetime Learning Credit, worth up to $2,000 per year, per student, has less strict requirements:

• There is no minimum on hours enrolled to qualify, and no limit to how many years the credit can be claimed.
• The credit covers tuition, books, fees and supplies for any student pursuing college or career education.

5. Avoid default at all cost

More than 1 million people default on their student loans each year. Not only can defaulting on anything hurt your credit loan, it has the potential to have your wages garnished — or your tax return withheld.

“This won’t happen if you’ve taken appropriate steps to set up a repayment plan or forgiveness program,” says Josh Zimmelman, owner and president of Westwood Tax & Consulting. “But if you’re just in default on your loans, then your tax refund is at risk.”

Student loans don’t go into default if you miss one payment. Ninety days after a loan is past due, it is then reported to the three major credit bureaus. After 270 days, the loan goes into default — which is when it drastically damages credit and erases any eligibility for deferment, forbearance and forgiveness.

If you are struggling with student loan payments, consider calling your servicer to create a plan that will help you better manage the cost. You might be eligible for a hardship program or settlement.

6. Don’t use 529 funds to make student loan payments

Under current law, funds in 529 plans can be used on a 100 percent tax-free basis when put toward qualified educational expenses, such as tuition and fees or room and board.

However, you cannot use 529 funds to make student loans payments. If you do, you’ll be hit with a 10 percent penalty and will be taxed on that money as income.

7. Received forgiveness? Get ready to pay

Student loans are not taxable as income.

However, if you are granted loan forgiveness, then you will be taxed on the total amount forgiven.

Keep in mind that loan forgiveness is not the same as loan discharge. Any student loan debt that is discharged due to death or total and permanent disability (TPD) is no longer taxable. This law is in effect for eligible loans discharged from Jan. 1, 2018 to Dec. 31, 2025.

Resources for tax help with student loans

Overall, navigating student loans on your taxes can be tricky. Thankfully, there are plenty of resources available to help guide you through the process.

Those who want direct help from the IRS can access the 970 worksheet, titled “Tax Benefits for Education,” through its website. This worksheet outlines tuition reductions, how to claim credits, an explanation of the interest deduction and more.

Those who feel unsure of filing their taxes themselves should reach out to a certified accountant for help.

Need more help? Check out Bankrate’s 10 best tax-planning tips for filing in 2019.