Tag Archives: dating advice
Widow returns to the dating pool and finds troubled water
Dear Abby:
I was widowed seven years ago. When my husband died, I thought it was the end of my suffering. It had been a mentally and physically abusive marriage for 30 years. We were complete opposites and were always financially stressed.
I have decided to start dating again. I want to meet someone and hopefully feel loved. I joined a dating website, but the men on it look disturbed and creepy. I have no friends, and I feel like I’m dying. I’m 57. Where are all the good men? I am at a loss.
My boss told me I should consider dating women since I have had no luck meeting men. She is pushing me into meeting her lesbian friend. Her friend was in an abusive marriage, and her husband is no longer in her life. Abby, I’m shocked that she would even suggest it.
I’m considering quitting my job because it’s awkward being around my boss. She started joking about it with other co-workers until I told her to stop bringing up the subject. Even though she has curbed her tongue, the fact still remains that my co-workers know she wanted to match me with a woman. I cringe working around her and want to crawl under a rock. Please help.
— Longing to be Loved
Dear Longing: It’s time to join some different dating sites and enlarge your pool of dating prospects. However, when you do, keep in mind that your marital history may have negatively affected your judgment about men. “Dating” does not carry with it a guarantee of love. Your relationship with your husband should have shown you that. Also, because a man doesn’t photograph well does not mean he’s disturbed or creepy. (One woman’s creep can be another woman’s Prince Charming.)
That said, if I ever heard about creating a hostile work environment, what your boss did is a textbook example and should have been discussed with HR. “Joking” about an employee’s sexuality is considered to be both discriminatory and a form of sexual harassment. Her behavior was beyond the pale, and you should start looking for another job.
Dear Abby: My 47-year-old son is employed at a prestigious university. His position involves a considerable amount of travel.
Over the years, he always emailed us his travel plans along with flight information. Lately, he tells us when and where he is going but omits the flight, hotel information, etc. When we ask, our requests are ignored. When we tell him we think it’s irresponsible for him not to share this information, his response is, “My secretary has the information if there are any problems.”
We always give our children our travel information, flights, hotels, etc. when we travel. Our question is, are we out of line for wanting this information from him?
— Loving Parents in New Hampshire
Dear Parents: You are not out of line for wanting the information; you are out of line for insisting your adult son give it to you over his objection. Your son is 47. He is no longer a child. It’s time to back off.
How To Find And Fall In Love With Your Soulmate (And Finally Become Kindred Spirits)
You can find your soul’s perfect mate online.
Trying to figure out how to find your soulmate through online dating and fall in love, so you can finally become kindred spirits with the guy or gal of your dreams?
Looking for love and a soul-level connection via online dating apps can feel like a part-time job, which is why single women need some smart dating advice that will turn their luck around.
The old saying “The good ones are already taken” doesn’t really apply anymore. Instead, the expression “There are plenty of fish in the sea” rings more true. In fact, the number of potential soulmate matches online can be pretty overwhelming.
Some say it’s a numbers game, like one of my clients who went on 100 dates before meeting her husband. And while there is truth to that, there are likely some deeper reasons you haven’t fallen in love with your kindred spirit yet.
If you want to learn how to find your soulmate and start falling in love, here are 4 ways single women can find their kindred spirits through online dating apps:
1. Get your ego in check.
If you are one of the millions of single women who are currently dating online, your number of potential matches are limitless. And while you might be thinking “the more options, the better,” it can go to your head and inflate your ego over time if you’re not careful.
For example, one guy I know was having a lot of success on Bumble. And although he had met some amazing women, he kept going on date after date with new and interesting ladies, despite wanting to find “the one.”
He was addicted to all the attention. His ego loved that so many women were interested in him that it kept him wanting more — which means he was always looking for that next date, rather than a quality relationship.
2. Stop absorbing negativity from others.
If the friends and family that you surround yourself with talk nothing but smack about men, it’s hard not to agree with them. There are some people who have only negative comments to make. Whether the bar is too crowded or how slow your waitress is, they pretty much complain about everything — especially when it comes to love and dating. Let’s call them “the Naysayers”.
It’s wonderful to have a community of people who love us and support you. But, when that community is filled with “Naysayers” and negativity, it can paralyze your love life. So keep their mentally block out their negativity so you can maintain a positive outlook when you’re looking for love.
3. Get clear about what you want.
Swiping right on a guy just because he’s hot doesn’t usually turn into the long-lasting relationship you’re seeking. So before you start swiping thousands of guys on whatever online dating apps you may be using, get clear about what you want — in a relationship, in a man and in life.
By reading guys’ profiles and taking cues from their photos, you can easily assess whether they’d be a match for what you’re looking for and save yourself (and him!) from any unnecessary heartache.
For example, after Will had five magical dates with Susie, she told him she wasn’t ready for a relationship and Will was devastated. Had Susie been upfront and clear about what she was looking for, they could have potentially continued a relationship based on those terms.
Or, Will never would’ve asked Susie on a second date if he knew she didn’t want anything serious, saving them both time and energy they could’ve spent connecting with someone who might’ve been a better match.
4. Believe in your power to find true love.
That inner voice in your head can sure be a Debbie Downer. She loves to tell you that you don’t deserve a great guy. You’re not good enough for him. You’re not worthy of having your dreams come true by meeting your kindred spirit.
All of these self-bullying thoughts might be the biggest reason you’re single, despite being on online dating apps and actively trying to find a soulmate.
Meeting new people can be scary, especially if it’s someone you’re considering sharing your life with. But if you buy into these self-doubts that your inner voice is telling you, you’ll exude energy that’s filled with negativity and fear. And that’s going to be a total turn-off for guys. Both men and women find confidence attractive. And in order to be confident about dating, you have to actually believe — and know — that you are worthy and deserving of love!
That’s why the more self-aware you become about who you are, what you’re looking for, and how you’re showing up in the world, the more empowered you can be in dating.
There are plenty of fabulous fish in the sea. So if you do these 4 things, you can get out there, meet your soulmate and feel the joy of being kindred spirits at last.
f you’re feeling overwhelmed by online dating or need to get clear about what you really desire in a relationship, soulmate and attraction coach Kelly Ann Garnett can help. Sign up here to schedule a free session with Kelly and find out how you can navigate online dating apps and easily to meet your soulmate.
This article was originally published at Kelly Ann Garnett. Reprinted with permission from the author.
Future Serves Wine and Dating Advice in New StubHub Commercial
Future takes a dip into the acting world. Just a few days ago (July 15), Hendrix pulled up in a brand-new commercial for StubHub, which, if you didn’t know, is an online ticket exchange company.
In the new advert, the Atlanta rapper, who dropped off his Beast Mode 2 mixtape earlier this month, plays the role of a waiter at an upscale restaurant. The scene begins with a young man contemplating a date with his girlfriend for whom he’s just copped an ankle bracelet. For his appearance in the clip, Future maintains an extra calm demeanor as he pours out some top-notch wine and gives the guy some helpful, if a bit self-serving advice.
“It’s Trish’s birthday,” Future says after pulling up to the young dude’s table. “A fine lady like that, she deserve more than a ankle bracelet from the mall—like tickets to my sold-out show.”
Since he’s known for his anthemic bangers, it’s a bit hard to separate Hendrix from his career as a rap superstar. With that in mind, it’s cool to see Future popping up in a commercial like this one.
Peep Hendrix’s new commercial for yourself below. Check out Future, Migos and Young Thug’s remix of Cardi B’s “Drip” when you’re done.
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