Category Archives: marriage advice
Opinion: Advice for Meghan Markle's father ahead of his daughter's wedding
Will Meghan Markle’s father, Thomas, attend the royal wedding?
Meghan Markle and Prince Harry laughing.
Source: Associated Press
On Tuesday, we heard that he would not. He cited embarrassment: He had posed for a series of wistful photographs near his home in New Mexico looking at the couple online, being fitted for a suit, reading about Britain. He said it was to improve his public image — the paparazzi often shoot him buying fast food and exercising — but then he felt uncomfortable about this and did not want to go to Windsor Castle for the wedding. This was disappointing, and also unnecessary: He was having a normal reaction to the idea of giving his daughter in marriage to a Windsor when he is a retired television lighting director and they are a House of Wax.
Thomas Markle’s decision is a bombshell for the bride-to-be.
Source: 1 NEWS
On Wednesday, though, Mr. Markle said he would like to attend, if his health allowed it. Perhaps it would set his mind at ease to know a little more about the House of Windsor and the British aristocracy in general. I’m sure they can seem strange and intimidating from a distance. For those of us who have observed them for longer, however, there is not only nothing to be afraid of — there is plenty to be amused at.
In 2018, it’s fine to be a commoner. The royal family no longer seeks aristocrats for brides. Aristocrats are too giddy. “The firm” needs competent and reliable employees who photograph well. A princess is a visual medium. Actresses, if sane and driven, may be suitable. Consider Prince William’s marriage to the middle-class Kate Middleton, which is judged a success. Now holding the title of Duchess of Cambridge, she was recently praised in The Daily Mail, a powerful mid-market tabloid for monarchists, for — and this is crucial — fulfilling her middle-class roots, rather than transcending them. She is considered careful and hard-working, like a welder or postman.
That’s according to a new report from website TMZ
Source: US ABC
And Ms. Markle’s mother, Doria Ragland, will not be the first royal mother-in-law to have worked as a flight attendant. The Duchess of Cambridge’s mother, Carole Middleton, was also a flight attendant — reportedly given the nickname of “Doors to Manual” by rude young aristocrats. If Ms. Ragland is ever called the same, she and Carole Middleton can commiserate with each other and, ideally, fight back with shoes.
In fact, be proud of your daughter’s career. Ms. Markle is not the first television actress to join the royal family, though with “Suits,” she is the most successful one. Queen Elizabeth II’s cousin Lord Frederick Windsor married Sophie Winkleman, who portrayed a waitress/actress called Big Suze in a British television comedy called “Peep Show.” And the queen’s grandson Peter Phillips is married to Autumn Kelly, who played something called Tigrette No. 3 in a 1995 movie called “Rainbow,” which I have not seen.
Do not fear the queen. The queen will be very polite. Being polite is the central and most accurate prong of her myth. During the Thames Diamond Jubilee Pageant in 2012, her politeness led her to stand on the royal barge for four hours with her husband in the pouring rain. (He got cystitis. She did not). She was polite to Wallis Simpson, the Duchess of Windsor, at the funeral of the former Edward VIII, who had abdicated to marry her and imperilled the monarchy. The queen even kissed her. In 1972, in England, that was a full-body hug. She would be as polite to Mr. Markle as she was to the duchess and that rain.
And do not fear the British aristocracy. The aristocracy is less polite, but its members usually express their impolitesse with silence and exclusion. And if they do express it, a non-aristocrat will probably not understand what they are saying, since they speak in drawling half-syllables that are the product of centuries of being listened to.
And there is no need to worry that your daughter will fail: The villainesses who’ve earned a place in British royal history have set too high a bar for that. Wicked and clumsy women have been marrying into the royal family for centuries, and Ms. Markle would have to work hard to match them.
Isabella, the wife of Edward II and, many believe, a conspirator in his murder, was probably the worst. Anne of Cleves, the fourth wife of Henry VIII, was considered too ugly to be made love to and was divorced — by an obese king with a bad leg (no one has suggested it was fair). She is thought by some to have been one of his most successful wives. Caroline, wife of George IV, was accused of adultery and forbidden to attend his coronation at Westminster Abbey, but she went anyway. The doors were barred to her and she died shortly afterward.
Henry II imprisoned his wife, Eleanor of Aquitaine, for treason. The father of Princess Michael of Kent (born Marie Christine von Reibnitz) joined the Nazi part in 1930, three years before Hitler came to power. Three years before it was even fashionable!
The British establishment remembers all this and it likes the idea of Ms. Markle, who cannot at this stage be more than an idea. They like her mixed-race heritage because “the firm,” as the royal family calls itself, must mirror the nation; they like her humanitarian-speak, which sounds good on Twitter, even if the concept of a humanitarian princess is absurd; and they like her real or pretended warmth and wokeness.
Mr. Markle can assure the wedding guests that, guided by his bride, Prince Harry will never again wear a swastika armband to a fancy-dress party and that he is a feminist now. No British prince has been called a feminist before, not even as an insult.
If Mr. Markle’s doctors give him the all-clear, he should walk his daughter down the aisle. If he insists on trying to impress the royals, he can realistically proceed in one of two ways: He can smile, nod and listen — he can, essentially, behave like a woman — or he can play a satirical version of himself for his audience. The Duchess of Cambridge’s uncle, Gary Goldsmith (“Uncle G”), who owns a house in Ibiza called La Maison de Bang Bang, chose this path. That might be more successful. It will definitely be more fun to watch.
People were asked to share what they wish they knew before they married. It got very real.
Weddings are the coolest. An entire day is dedicated to all things you and your soulmate. But once the fanfare dies down and there’s no longer wedding cake in the freezer, sometimes people forget the other part of the deal – the fact they have to spend the next few decades years with the person they kissed at the altar.
Reddit users are saving the day once again, sharing the advice they wish they’d been given before their wedding day. Proceed with caution, this is real talk.
People change – for better or for worse.
Tazi752000 shared the following advice, “People often change throughout their lives, but not just because they got married. Many people get married with either the expectation that marriage will change their SO or that the person will stay the same forever. Neither are correct. People will change, but not always in the ways that you expect and you have to be willing to adapt to them.”
“Marriage is for life, but people continue to change. This will be particularly noticeable the younger you get married. Be prepared to communicate a lot about this on both ends and learn to adapt. The person you are marrying today likely will be a very different person in ten years,” wrote Zazzlekdazzle.
Family matters.
“How they relate to their family and if you can handle it. If, say, your partner’s family is nauseatingly close and loves to spend time together, are you down with that? Is your partner good at setting boundaries? In-laws can destroy relationships,” shared TBogusS301.
“Where you’re going to spend holidays. How much time you’re going to spend with each family. Most people don’t realize how much stress each other’s families bring to the table. Always be a united front,” wrote Amandabee8.
“Once you get married, your immediate family is no longer your parents or siblings, it is your spouse. That can be a hard change for some people,” shared Asielen.
Letransient shared this gem, “This is it. I have a family of four. Me, my wife, and our two kids. We love our extended families, but they are peripheral. My bond with my wife and my children is MUCH stronger than my bond with my parents and my siblings (and, frankly, my bond with my wife is a tiny bit stronger than my bond with my kids). If there’s a conflict between what my parents want and what my wife wants, there’s no conflict, just a bit of emotional labour as I explain to my parents that we’re not doing the thing they prefer. Not everyone sees things this way. I can’t imagine seeing it any differently. But I would make sure you have similar views about family relationship pecking orders before getting married.”
Test out the tricky stuff before you get married.
Mista_Madridista shared the gem of advice we all need, “Go to Ikea together. It’s like Hunger Games for relationships.”
“When my grandfather asked my grandmother to marry him her father made them both sit down and write a list of 10 deal breakers. They then had to discuss them all to decide if they could both live with them before he would give his blessing. In over 50 yrs of marriage neither one crossed the deal breaker line and they had a head start on open communication channels from the experience. The other thing they did was to ensure that each of them got at least one hour of me time every day from Monday to Friday (the other would watch the kids and there would be no chores done during that time) and weekends were family time,” wrote GrumpyKitten1.
CaptainClay2606 kept things brief, writing “Pretend you aren’t going to have a wedding. Still wanna get married?”
“When you fight, remember that you two are on the same side. Sometimes it’ll feel like it’s you versus her… whenever it feels like that, Stop. Back up. Figure out how it’s you both versus the world (or you both versus the fear they’re feeling, or you both versus the problems you’re having or whatever…) and not the two of you against each other. Hell, try to remember that when you’re not fighting too. If you can’t do this… well, I won’t say “don’t get married”… but do work on this, it’s important,” wrote Allisade.
FondantisNasty talks from experience, “In my experience, moving in together changed the relationship more than getting married did.”
“That you agree on the important topics: Children (and how to raise them), Finances/Expenditures, Future Plans, Religion, these are the likeliest topics to have little to no compromise on so if you disagree drastically it will eventually cause a rift,” wrote Kilen13.
Keep up the momentum – it won’t be easy.
VictorBlimpmuscle has all of the wisdom, “Don’t forget to continue going on dates after you’re married.”
“It’s work, and it’s everyday work. If you want a healthy relationship you need to tend to that relationship,” wrote SCFE1.
Daitoshi gets real, writing “Some days your SO is vomiting their guts out and literally cannot do any chores or emotional work. Their job is to empty their gut and moan into the toilet about how terrible life is while you fetch water and crackers and keep the rest of the house in line.”
“Your SO most likely fell in love with the best and strongest version of you. When you get married, make sure that your SO will still love you when you’re down. It’s a lifetime. Hard times will come. This goes both ways. Also, marriage is work. If you don’t put effort into it, it becomes boring,” wrote Throwawayventing2018.
Reddit has weighed in. It kind of seems like you should think about a lot of stuff before tying the knot.
Columbia lawyer who served with Prince Harry offers advice before the royal wedding
When then-Maj. William Connor was deployed to Afghanistan with the SC National Guard’s 218th Brigade Combat Team in 2007, little did he know who he might meet.
Sent to a forward operating base at Lashka Gah, the capital of the Helmend Province in Afghanistan, to work with the British Army fighting the Taliban, Connor met and worked with then-Lt. Harry Windsor — also known as Prince Henry of Wales or Prince Harry.
The prince’s job was to call in air strikes, hitting Taliban positions that were attacking the forward positions.
“I was impressed by the fact that he wanted to be treated like everyone else,” says Connor. “He didn’t need to go to the most dangerous places to serve.
“He is the real deal. He felt the obligation to serve, and that’s very noble.”
Connor said that the British soldiers in Afghanistan were under orders not to reveal Harry’s position. The prince had already been denied service as a tank commander in Iraq because of concerns that he or his unit would be targets for insurgents.
Harry became an air controller in order to deploy to Afghanistan and served there in late 2007 and early 2008 until Australian and German publications revealed he was in the country.
On Saturday, Harry is scheduled to wed American actress Meghan Markle at a ceremony at Windsor Castle. Connor has some advice for the soon-to-be newlywed.
“Marriage is a lifetime commitment,” he says. “Become friends with her, keep your fun nature.”
Life will change with children, and remember the commitment, he said.
Connor, now practicing law in Orangeburg and Columbia, believes that this is a good period in Harry’s life to settle down. He says that if the prince, 33, takes the same values he exhibited during his military service into the marriage, he should find success.
“I wish him Best Hopes.”
Majid Michel has this important marriage advice for John Dumelo
Entertainment of Tuesday, 15 May 2018
Source: ghanafuo.com
Award-winning Ghanaian actor and pastor Majid Michel has an important marriage advice for the latest celebrity couple in town, John Dumelo and Gifty Mawunya. John Dumelo and Gifty Mawunya tied the knot on Saturday, May 12 in Accra.
In attendance at the star-studded ceremony were Yvonne Nelson, Majid Michel, Christabel Ekeh, former president John Dramani Mahama, Nadia Buari, Selassie Ibrahim, among others.
A few days after the marriage ceremony, Majid Michel took to his Instagram page advising John to love Gifty until his last breath.
He shared a photo of John kissing Gifty’s ring with the caption: “Let Jesus in. He is what you need”. We choose to Love. Love is a choice not a feeling. Your hand has already been taken. Your life long promise should always stand. Until your last breath you will always hold her hand.
Through everything she’s half of you. Even though you may not always agree, you shall never part. This world may not be fair, but through sickness and in health, promise to be there.
To make her happy, that’s your only wish. To love and obey is also part of your promise. Anytime things get rough, always remember, sometimes God let’s you hit rock bottom so that you will discover that He is the Rock at the bottom. @johndumelo1 Congratulations! #LEADERSHiP
