Category Archives: Marriage & Divorce
Bride-to-be plans walk down the aisle after dad's death
Dear Abby:
My boyfriend and I are talking marriage soon, and I’m already stressing over who will walk me down the aisle.
I always planned for it to be my dad, but he passed away a month ago. Mom remarried when I was young, but I have never had a close relationship with my stepdad. He mentioned years ago that he’d like to walk me down the aisle one day, but I honestly would rather he didn’t. I don’t want to hurt his feelings or strain our relationship, but I also don’t want to feel like I am replacing Daddy, who I was very close with.
Is it taboo to walk down the aisle alone? Or must I just suck it up and walk with my stepdad for the sake of not hurting his feelings?
— Marriage in
Minneapolis
Dear Marriage: Brides can (and should) walk down the aisle with the companion of their choice. When the bride’s father is deceased, the escort can be her mother or a close male relative. I have also heard of brides escorted down the aisle by their canine companion, which proves that although they say a dog is man’s best friend, it can also be a woman’s.
You are not obligated to have anyone walk you to the altar because the person asks. If your stepfather repeats his request, tell him the truth — that it would be too hurtful because it would feel like he was replacing your father, something no one can ever do. You should also know that these days some women feel being “given away” is an anachronistic custom, and make their way alone to join their groom at the altar.
Dear Abby: My husband and my mother had a good relationship before we were married. But since our wedding two years ago, he complains about her nonstop while pointing out ways that I am like her. My brothers feed into it too. They often have long conversations together detailing her “many” negative qualities.
Recently, while we were visiting my parents’ home, Mom overheard my husband say very critical things about her. She got upset and kind of shut down emotionally and socially for the rest of the visit. We both apologized to her separately, but she said she was tired of being criticized and tired of him being mean to me as well.
I have a history of depression. My husband and I have tried counseling multiple times, with no progress because he feels our problems are “my responsibility.” My husband is a good person, but it hurts me to see my mother upset and to have the two most important people in my life so at odds. Advice?
— Torn in
Dear Torn: I’m glad to offer some, but first you will have to accept that “good” husbands don’t act like yours does. If there are things he doesn’t like about your mother, he should take them up with her directly, not behind her back the way he did. I don’t blame her for feeling hurt. How else was she supposed to respond?
What your husband did was destructive, not helpful. The same is true for the way he treats you. Counseling hasn’t worked because of his unwillingness to accept any responsibility for your problems as a couple. My advice is to talk to a licensed therapist on your own, which will help you to see your situation more clearly than you appear to do.
Pastor Adeboye's wife explains controversial marriage advice
On October 4, 2018, Pastor Enoch A. Adeboye’s wife was severely criticized for a certain controversial marriage advice.
Speaking on day 4 of the ongoing Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG) annual youth convention, Mrs. Folu Adeboye said, “There should be no confusion in the house of God. You have to go to your Pastor first to consult for marriage before your parent.”
She immediately got dragged by social media users who felt that parents should be considered first, not pastors.
Later that day, the church’s official Twitter handle uploaded a clip for clarity sake.
According to Pastor Folu, couples need to seek their pastor’s counsel because “there must not be any confusion in the body of Christ where God is leading.”
She backed her point with Psalm 16: 8–11 which says, “I have set the LORD always before me: because he is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.”
ALSO READ: Pastor Adeboye’s wife kisses him in public & people go crazy
More marriage advice from Pastor Adeboye’s wife
Apart from this controversial advice, the preacher, who is fondly referred to as ‘Mother in Israel’ or as ‘Mummy G.O,’ had more things to say.
Pastor Folu also encouraged young adults to seek God first, get jobs and be accountable before getting married.
Here is what Pastor Adeboye said about marriage:
The event was themed; “The Indomitable Family.”
Man married for 15 years shares important marriage tips online
Marriage as is well known, is not always a smooth ride for some people. While many people attribute successful marriages to settling down with the right person, this man has taken to social media to share a few tips.
Identified as Ajero Morgan, the Nigerian man shared some very interesting advice on how to get one’s marriage going. Having recently clocked 15 years in marriage, Ajero appeared to many as someone who certainly knew his onions when it comes to marriage.
He recently took to the Twitter platform to give 5 marriage advice based on the things he has personally learnt. From learning how to deal with your wife to learning how to satisfy her and building a faith-based relationship, he seemed to get a lot of audience on the platform.
According to Morgan, one of the things he’s learnt from being married is that, one must get ready to handle 3 personalities when you get married to a person; the person you thought you married, the person you married and the person he/she is going to be as a result of being married to you.
READ ALSO: You have to go to your pastor to consult for marriage before your parent – Pastor Foluke Adeboye
He wrote:
“I’m 15 years in marriage Today. And here’re 5 things I’ve learnt: /1. When you marry 1 woman, expect to live with 3 women: 1. The woman you think she is 2. The woman she is 3. And the woman she’s going to become as a result of being married to you. The third one is up to you.
/2. Your woman does not really need you to do the “big” things to satisfy her. Seemingly “little things” like hugging her, kissing her on the forehead, telling her you love her, noticing her new hairstyle, sitting with her in the kitchen makes her feel so loved and valued.
READ ALSO: Nigerian legal practitioner lists 7 sins of Davido as a corps member
/3. Don’t “demand” respect from your woman. Respect her and her values first and let it show in your words and actions. What you continously pour on her is what she’ll eventually become to you. Be genuine but be visionary also. It’ll help her to trust you more and follow you.
/4. The most “expensive” s*x is “free” s*x. Stop valuing a side chic because she costs you more money. That’s called irrational behavioral tendency in marketing. What your woman gives you for free at home is the most expensive. So Invest in it. That’s wisdom for long life.
/5. Build your relationships and family on a foundation of love and reverence for God. The prosperity and grace to sustain a happy marriage comes from Him. It’s not by power or might.”
Pretty interesting!
Still on the issue of marriage advice, social media has been thrown into a debate after Foluke Adeboye, wife of the the general overseer of Redeemed Christian Church of God, Pastor Emmanuel Adeboye, stated during a church programme that, that a couple seeking endorsement for their marriage ought to go to their pastor first before going to their parents.
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Source: Naija.ng
Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin Are Already Married
More clues have emerged suggesting Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin are already married but still plan to have a formal ceremony with their friends and family, according to TMZ.
Justin and Hailey were seen walking into a courthouse in New York City on Sept. 13, and many people wondered if the 24-year-old pop singer secretly married his 21-year-old model fiancée at that time.
“Justin y Hailey se casaron el mes pasado en Nueva York, el mismo día que obtuvieron su licencia de matrimonio en el juzgado. Tenían a un predicador a mano: Jeffrey Quinn, un miembro de la facultad en Nyack College, cerca del juzgado.” pic.twitter.com/43iL01HiLj
— Hailey Baldwin News (@ItsBaldwinNews) October 2, 2018
Baldwin responded to the rumor with a tweet that she later deleted.
“I understand where the speculation is coming from, but I’m not married yet!” she wrote.
However, TMZ reported on Oct. 2 that the couple was indeed married, with Jeffrey Quinn as the preacher and Josh Mehl as a witness. Quinn teaches at Nyack College near the courthouse, and Mehl is Justin’s church friend.
In addition, Bieber was heard referring to Baldwin as his wife at the exhibit of “Bieber, Steps to Stardom” dedicated to his career, at the Stratford Perth Museum in Ontario, Canada earlier this week.
Hailey left a sweet message, “I ❤ you forever-Hailey B” at the museum and it was posted on its Instagram, with the caption, “We were so pleased to have such a warm and special guest visit the museum yesterday (along with her very special husband 😊).”
“Justin very graciously introduced Hailey as his wife. Perhaps just a term of endearment? We loved their visit,” the museum shared in the comment section, but later removed it.
Screenshot of Stratford Perth Museum’s Instagram comment that was later deleted.
“Well, they went off and got married,” Hailey’s uncle Alec Baldwin said of his niece and Bieber during the 2018 Emmy Awards on Sept. 17, accidentally confirming the big news. He also gave them some marriage advice such as spending plenty of time together.
Sources said that the lovebirds met ten years ago as friends. They started dating each other briefly in 2015 and 2016. Bieber proposed to Baldwin in July.
“Not sure what I did in life to deserve such happiness but I am so utterly grateful to God for giving me such an incredible person to share my life with! No words could ever express my gratitude.” Baldwin said on Jul. 9.
Not sure what I did in life to deserve such happiness but I am so utterly grateful to God for giving me such an incredible person to share my life with! No words could ever express my gratitude. ❤️
— Hailey Baldwin (@haileybaldwin) July 9, 2018
“I am soooo in love with everything about you! So committed to spending my life getting to know every single part of you loving you patiently and kindLY,” Justin also put on Instagram on the same day. “You make me so much better and we compliment each other so well!!”
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